Feeling overwhelmed, irritable, or more emotional than you expected after having your baby? You’re not alone— and you’re not just “hormonal.” In this post, we’ll break down what actually happens to your hormones after birth, how it impacts your mood, and why breastfeeding and weaning can feel like an emotional crash. We’ll also share how therapy can support your emotional regulation during this intense season of change.

You’re Not Just “Emotional”- You’re Experiencing Real Physical Shifts

Postpartum emotions are no joke. One minute you’re in awe of your baby’s tiny fingers, the next you’re crying over a commercial. It can feel disorienting and even a little scary.

Here’s the truth: you’re not “too sensitive” or “overreacting.” Your body is undergoing one of the most dramatic hormonal transitions of your life (not too mention the severe sleep deprivation which will also lead to you feeling more intensely). Understanding what’s happening biologically can help you feel more grounded and more compassionate with yourself.

The Immediate Postpartum Drop: Estrogen, Progesterone, and Mood

Right after birth, your estrogen and progesterone levels drop rapidly, like falling off a cliff.

These hormones, which skyrocketed during pregnancy to support your baby’s growth, suddenly plummet. This sharp drop can lead to mood swings, tearfulness, and irritability in the first 1–2 weeks postpartum. This is commonly referred to as the “baby blues,” and it affects up to 80% of new moms.

But here’s the key difference:

If mood symptoms continue beyond two weeks, feel intense, or interfere with your daily functioning, it may be postpartum depression or postpartum anxiety- not just the baby blues.

But first, let’s talk more about Estrogen and Progesterone and why these are so important and significant in how we are feeling.

Estrogen: The Mood Stabilizer and Energizer

Estrogen generally has a positive effect on mood and cognition. This is mainly due to how it helps to increase and boost some other brain chemicals (Serotonin and Dopamine).

Serotonin, the “feel-good” neurotransmitter, helps improve mood, promotes emotional resilience, and supports better sleep and appetite regulation.

Dopamine is all about motivation, reward, and pleasure. It also helps you with focus and energy.

Estrogen can also protect you against anxiety and depression and it helps support your memory and mental clarity.

When Estrogen drops- like before your period (hello, PMS), after childbirth, or during perimenopause, you are more likely to feel irritable, sad or weepy, foggy or forgetful, and less motivated.

Progesterone: The Calmer and Soother

The hormone progesterone has more of a calming and sedating effect. This is due to it stimulating your GABA receptors in your brain. GABA is a calming neurotransmitter and helps you feel more relaxed, supports better sleep, and can ease your anxiety (when it’s in balance)

When progesterone is low or imbalanced (e.g. estrogen dominant states), you may feel:

Anxious or “wired by tired”
Restless
Prone to insomnia
Emotionally reactive or overwhelmed

Progesterone can also have a paradoxical effect for some people- too much or too sharp a rise can lead to depressive or flat moods, especially in the luteal phase (after ovulation, that 2nd half of your cycle).

The Dynamic Dance Between Estrogen and Progesterone

Here’s the thing- the balance between estrogen and progesterone is just as important as their individual levels.

In the second half of your cycle (the luteal phase), estrogen drops and progesterone rises. This shift can cause PMS symptoms which includes mood swings, anxiety, irritability, and fatigue. This is believed to be a major factor for PMDD (Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder) which is a more severe form of PMS that interferes with daily life.

After giving birth or during perimenopause, both hormones are either in flux or low, emotional symptoms like anxiety, mood lability, or depression can intensify.

Hormones During Pregnancy

When you first become pregnant, your Estrogen and Progesterone begin to rise pretty rapidly in order to support the pregnancy. These hormones continue to rise throughout the pregnancy, especially Estrogen which will be higher than any other time in your life during your third trimester and up till giving birth.

These high levels of Estrogen and Progesterone are helping to prepare your body for labor and breastfeeding.

Hormones After Birth (The Crash)

As soon as your placenta is delivered, your estrogen and progesterone levels will plummet. This sudden drop is the most significant hormonal shift a woman experiences outside of menopause.

This crash can contribute to:

Postpartum mood swings or “baby blues”
Fatigue
Night Sweats
Changes in libido
Hair loss

So no, you’re not going crazy! It’s your Estrogen and Progesterone dropping!!

The Rollercoaster of Oxytocin and Prolactin: Bonding and Breastfeeding

If you are breastfeeding or pumping, your estrogen will stay relatively low in order to allow prolactin (milk-producing hormone) to dominate.

This low estrogen can lead to:

Vaginal dryness (which can lead to sex feeling uncomfortable and even painful)
Low libido
Irregular or absent periods
Emotional sensitivity

This hormonal shift will often continue throughout breastfeeding and/or pumping until weaning is complete.

Breastfeeding also releases oxytocin (the “love hormone”) and prolactin, which can create feelings of closeness and calm. For some moms, nursing feels grounding and connected.

But it’s not always blissful.

Some moms experience D-MER (Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex), a wave of sadness, irritability, or anxiety that occurs just before or during let-down. It’s not about bonding or milk supply; it’s a neurological reflex triggered by hormonal shifts.

While there is no cure for D-MER, being aware of it and understanding it is a physiological response can help alleviate concerns and reduce distress.

If you think you experience D-MER here are some strategies that can help:

Relaxation techniques: practices such as deep breathing, mediation, or listening to calming music before and during breastfeeding and/or pumping sessions can help with any negative emotions.
Distraction: engage in activities like watching TV, reading, playing a game, or eating during breastfeeding and/or pumping can divert your attention from any distressing feelings.
Seeking out Support: Connecting with support groups, lactation consultants, and therapy can help with emotional support and practical advise.

Even if you’re not experiencing D-MER, the emotional ups and downs tied to breastfeeding are very real.

Sleep Deprivation, Cortisol, and the Stress Response

hormonal shifts after birth and sleep deprivation

Let’s talk about cortisol- your body’s main stress hormone. When you’re running on little sleep, your cortisol levels stay high, keeping you in a state of fight-or-flight. Add in the mental load of motherhood, and it’s no wonder you feel frazzled.

Over time, this constant stress can contribute to:

Anxiety and irritability
Mood crashes
Feelings of being “on edge” or disconnected
Memory struggles and difficulties with focus
Overall emotional dysregulation

Poor sleep can also lead to insulin resistance and unstable blood sugar.

Blood sugar crashes can make you:

Hangry, foggy, shaky, or anxious
Crave carbs and sugars (I was all about the baked goods during postpartum!)

Another important part of sleep is that it helps regulate and repair your hormonal systems. A lack of sleep can disrupt the normal rhythm of:

Estrogen, which again, helps with serotine production (the mood stabilizer)
Progesterone, which again, promotes relaxation and sleep through GABA activation.

So, when you’re already in a stage of hormonal transition of postpartum, sleep deprivation can amplify emotional sensitivity, anxiety, and depression.

Therapy that includes nervous system regulation techniques can help reduce cortisol levels and build emotional resilience during the postpartum period.

Weaning and Hormonal Changes: Why Stopping Breastfeeding + Pumping Feels Like a Crash

Here’s something many moms don’t expect: stopping breastfeeding (and/or pumping), even months after birth, can trigger a second emotional crash.

When you begin weaning, your prolactin and oxytocin levels drop again, which can lead to:

• Low mood

• Irritability

• Increased anxiety

• A sense of loss or grief

This can feel especially intense if you didn’t plan to stop breastfeeding or if the weaning process felt rushed or out of your control. Even when the decision to wean is intentional, it’s common to feel ambivalent.

What helps:

• Weaning slowly, if possible

• Increasing self-care and support

• Talking to a therapist who understands postpartum transitions

How Therapy Can Help Regulate Mood and Support Recovery

If you’re riding this hormonal rollercoaster and wondering, “Is it always going to feel this hard?”- you don’t have to figure it out alone.

At Happy Moms Therapy, we use a mind-body approach that includes:

• Nervous system regulation tools to calm emotional overwhelm

• EMDR resourcing techniques like Calm Place and the Container Exercise to build inner safety

• CBT tools to challenge negative thoughts like “I’m a bad mom” or “I’m failing”

• Exploration of identity, boundaries, and perfectionism, especially for high-achieving moms

Whether you’re a few weeks postpartum or months into motherhood, therapy can help you make sense of your emotions and feel more like yourself again.

You’re Not Alone And Your Deserve Support

If you’re noticing:

• Lingering sadness or mood swings

• Anxiety that doesn’t go away

• Rage or irritability that feels out of character

• Disconnection from your baby or partner

• Guilt or shame you can’t shake

…it might be time to reach out. These symptoms are common, but they don’t have to be your new normal. Therapy is a powerful tool to support your healing and help you reconnect with yourself in this season of motherhood.

Key Takeaways

• Hormonal shifts after birth, especially the drop in estrogen, progesterone, prolactin, and oxytocin, can significantly impact your mood.

• Emotional highs and lows during breastfeeding (and after stopping) are biologically driven, not a reflection of how you’re doing as a mom.

• Weaning can bring a second wave of emotional upheaval due to another hormonal shift.

• Therapy can help regulate mood, build emotional resilience, and support you through the mental load of motherhood.

• You are not alone. Getting help is a brave, loving step for you and your baby.

💛 At Happy Moms Therapy, we support moms in California through postpartum transitions with compassion, expertise, and evidence-based care.

If you’re ready to feel more grounded and supported, reach out here to schedule a free consultation.

Disclaimer: This is not a replacement for a therapeutic relationship or mental health services. This is for educational purposes only and should be in used only in conjunction in working with a licensed mental health professional. If you are in California and looking for a professional therapist feel free to contact me to request an appointment or search Psychology Today for local therapists in your area.

Hormonal Shifts and Mood Changes After Birth: What’s Really Going On